Sex can get stale, so why not spice things up… by having sex! This might sound crazy—or impossible—but take our word for it, this could change your sex life for the better. So, how do you sleep with someone without doing the deed? Read below to find out.Would you try having sex without actually having sex? Tell us why below!What is
having sex? Well, most people would categorize sex as penetration.
But if you want to get your rocks off without going all the way, there are plenty of methods to still fool around. The more, the merrier!
Just think of it as time travel back to high school. And while popular culture might have us believe that penetrative sex is the only sex worth having, these non-penetrative practices might improve the way you have sex by making you think outside the box, so to speak.
Taking intercourse out of the equation every now and then is especially helpful for women who have trouble orgasming. When there’s not the pressure of penetration and reaching that “goal,” sex can be a lot more enjoyable.
Making out. Focusing on kissing will really make you feel like a teenager again. Those endless hours spent kissing in the back of your boyfriend’s dad’s Ford Focus were magical, weren’t they? Try to kiss for as long as possible without going further… the longer you hold out, the hotter it’ll be when you finally give in.
Make it a game. One way to do this is by setting goals, like “I’m going to kiss you 100 times.” As we learned during childhood, games are fun.
Use your hands. Going to second base might seem juvenile, but it’s a part of sex that’s often overlooked. Look your partner deeply in the eyes as you use your hand to pleasure them—it’s an incredibly intimate experience.
And when it comes to the hands, ask for guidance. A great way to do this is to ask them to show you how they get off by themselves. This can be a nice, intimate experience for you two to share. Not to mention, it guarantees that your handy is above par.
Get ahead by giving head. Round third base and do your best to pass your partner’s oral exam. Now is the time when using your mouth isn’t just a pit stop on the way to full-on intercourse, it is the main event. Get into it— explore your partner like you haven’t before.
Be a tease! You might have been warned against this in the past, but focusing on the buildup and drawing it out foreeeeeevvveeeerrrrr can make the release—whenever it actually happens—so much better!
Focus on a specific body part. Maybe your lover has super sensitive nipples or earlobes. Maybe they love having their hair stroked. Lean into their kinks by spending a lovemaking session paying extra attention to that one erogenous zone.
Use toys! Most people think that toys are only for solo play, but they can be fun to use with/on your partner! This includes things like vibrators, handcuffs, really anything you can get your hands on. Well, maybe not Legos. Can you imagine if you lost one… somewhere?
Having sex without actually HAVING SEX might help you learn some new things about your partner. Where do they like to be touched? What turns them on the most?
It will also teach you some things about yourself, and about sex. Sex isn’t necessarily about penetration—it’s about pleasure, and all the different ways two people can bring each other pleasure.
This doesn’t mean that you should stop enjoying full-on intercourse, because HELLO, it’s fun! But if you want to be having the best sex possible, think outside the box… or outside YOUR box, as it were.